Wednesday, September 2, 2009

sin is sin...

My battle with gluttony has been a daily war since about the age of 10. I fell in love with the intoxicating feeling and euphoria food provided. Something triggered fairy-like endorphins that magically took away any feelings that I had. Fear, stress, loneliness, and insecurities disappeared in heaps of hot food.

Food was my frienemy!

What makes this sin difficult to talk about is gluttony is different from other sins because like air, we need food. However, we justify our actions because it’s a necessity [insert loophole here]. By doing so we justify this sin and lessen the weight of it because it’s not a “bigger” sins. But sin is sin. Period.

The problem is that a simple definition of gluttony will fall short because it doesn’t address the heart of overeating. What does God say about this? Paul the Apostle, in tears, warned that many are living like enemies of the cross of Christ whose destiny is destruction and god is there stomach (Phil. 3:18-19). But the problem is that there is a legalism in dieting. Controlled eating = righteous. But it couldn’t be more wrong! The issue is at the heart. For me personally, I couldn’t control my actions. Telling me to stop eating was like telling a paraplegic to stand up and walk. It was impossible.

No one understands the emotional turmoil, guilt, embarrassment, and defeat that you feel when you try on clothes, step on a scale, or see people look at you and stare. I couldn’t understand why God wouldn’t help me?! I mean, this was my health and I was asking him to help me! Literally, I was crying out to Him for help.

But I was asking for the wrong thing. I wanted Him to change my body, but not change my heart.

If you think you can handle this sin, it’s putting you at odds against Jesus Christ and what He did for you at the cross. It’s time to grieve and mourn our sin, but not live in condemnation of feeling hopeless, helpless, and worthless. Conviction is good, but condemnation is bad (Romans 8:1).

Here is a snippet that Denny from Bridgeport Productions put together out of his own time and dime. Thanks, DB!

19 comments:

Kaitlynn Chritton said...

Thanks for sharing your heart. I love coming to your blog and reading what you so openly share with us.

And I am sorry to say, but I also read your sisters blog... and her story about your all star hurdling career and it made my night- her description of the whole event might have caused me to laugh tears! Don't you love having a sister blogging online about all your embarrassing stories?!?

With love,
Kaitlynn

Betzography said...

And the Lord reached down and bonked me on the head.

Thank you. I never looked at my eating as sin nor did I look at it as being something above my love for the Lord. Your daily prayer needs to be my hourly prayer though right now I feel like I'll never be able to get past this.

Anonymous said...

Pray for those of us that continue to struggle with this and are desperate to change.

Bianca said...

@kaitlynn: i KNOW?! can you believe it. it was quite hilarious.
@betzography: thank you for your candor. i will be praying for you as this is a personal struggle for me too! phil. 4:6
@anon: i promise you i will and i do. it's tough to post comments admitting we have problems, but let's be honest with ourselves and with God.

Alisa Greig said...

Great eye-opener, thank you for sharing all that you do. I came across your blog through Jasmine's a while back and always enjoy your thoughts and message--God is good!

Kelly Langner Sauer said...

Wow. I honestly don't know what to say to this. I've never heard of anyone who really struggled with gluttony. My sister has been dealing with eating disorder/body image issues for years, but she refuses to eat, because she is actually afraid of being a glutton if she eats a normal meal.

I'm curious - outside of what you said here about it being a heart issue (which I TOTALLY agree with), what does gluttony look like on a physical level?

Spiritual Awakening said...

Wow. That is so true. Thank you for letting God use you to deliver that message.

SHALOM said...

Great Snipet of Gods Wisdom. Isn't it awesome to know that He is such a loving Abba Father who invites us to confess our sins openly, and letting us know that He is ready to forgive and embrace us.

I struggle with talkaholism. And I daily have to ask God to set a Gaurd over my mouth. Thank U Jesus that we are all a work in progress.

Thank U Bianca for the clip.
Blessings.

renay. said...

B, if I may, I want to encourage everyone reading this blog who thinks... scratch that... KNOWS that gluttony is their sin, to pray that God will reveal to them the brokenness that this sin masks (my note from Bianca's full teaching on gluttony). I, too, struggled (and when my guard is down... struggle) with this sin but when I prayed (and it took a good week after hearing her teaching), and God revealed it to me. When I got to the root of the issue, there was some freedom in that, however, because this is a weakness of mine, it is still a struggle. But it doesn't have to be, when you call on God regarding this sin ask Him to also provide a friend, family member, or anyone else to come along side of you, to pray for you, and to stay accountable to. You are not alone and you don't have to do this alone!

renay. said...

P.S. Blog-readers, ask Bianca to post the link for the full teaching... you'll be touched, convicted, encouraged, blessed, and so-on-and-so-on! ;)

Bianca said...

@alisa: woohoo for joining the comment-club :) it's awesome how we all can be connected!
@spiritual awakening: it's my joy!
@shalom: sweet! as tough as the bible study was for me to give, i know it was eye-opening for those who struggle with eating (either over-eating or under-eating).
@kelly: people think gluttons are all fat, but this isn't always the case. i don't have all the answers but i did do a bunch of research for this talk. i'm going to see if i can post it...
@renay: your encouragement makes me feel like i can keep on doing what i do! thanks for being my cheerleader :)

Tiffany said...

Okay...I'm not going to be a blog stalker. I usually am - I read but never comment. But...I came upon your blog from your sister's today and just felt like I needed to say:

#1 - You're beautiful. Inside and out. You're fiesty, fun, real and sassy and I can appreciate that. AND, best of all...

#2 - You LOVE JESUS! Your love for the Lord and the calling that you are walking in is so encouraging and refreshing. I'm so glad that I've found your blog. :)

I pray that the Lord would overwhelm you with His favor in everything that you do! :)

Amanda May said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Candice {The Beautiful Mess} said...

boy can I identify with this one! thank you for helping me think about the ROOT of the sin.

great words...as always! love it!

Cindy A. said...

Thanks B, for helping me see my sins and be more transparent. I also need to break the habit of looking away from what I struggle with.

Hugs!

Char Baiz said...

Hi! I found your blog through your sis' blog and I love it. Thank you so much for this post. I love the way you put it when you said it's not about changing your body, it's about changing your heart. I had never thought of it that way. Very encouraging :)

unveiled said...

B,
You touched on the fact that the struggle with food is difficult because it is a necessity. Our training as christians teaches us to run from and completely stay away from our weak areas. I have found this to lead to bondage in other areas of sin that you can battle against by staying away or putting laws around you that will supposedly keep you from your sin.
You hit the core issue of all sin and that is the heart. There is freedom in coming to truly believe we are new, and those sins are not us, and have no power or hold on us. The beauty of that newness overpowers the allure of whatever tries to draw me back into the old heart. I can learn to walk in strength among the things that used to threaten my stability, without having to wall myself in with a whole lot of rules and regulations. My heart is new and therefore free because it's true desires are good and pure and beautiful.
My latest post speaks of that inner struggle that goes on when temptation comes at me. I'm experiencing the strength of my Jesus like never before, and it is beautiful.

Marie said...

Hi Bianca,

I found you through a comment you left on another blog, Righteous Paths. I wanted to share that I know the struggle you describe, and how much worse it can get. I was a hopeless bulimic for 17 years, and Christ set me free and renewed my mind entirely (once I repented of this idolatry). I have written a book on biblical repentance and restoration from eating disorders, which is due to be out next year.

Through my blog I also provide free online counsel to any women struggling with food or full-blown eating disorders: http://redeemedfromthepit.blogspot.com/

Great blog you have, btw!

Marie said...

P.S. - A chapter of my book, "Renewing Your Mind with the Washing of the Word" was published by E-zine: http://ezinearticles.com/?id=2782792

I discuss how Romans 12:1-2 applies to food addictions.

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